Fucking Crushed Alloy (foreignpetals) wrote,
Fucking Crushed Alloy

Soulful words are merry instruments.

No… wait… no no….. wait. It’ll happen…. wait…. no no no!

I still don’t understand how I was the only one who could hear Harper scream at his self lockdown to sun up. It was explained to me-some about acoustics- by some computer hacker that been doin ten for drug charges. It was always the same, though: I’d hear scribbling and Harper cursing everyone’s name but the good Lord his self. We all thought he had a couple screws loose to tell the truth. Motherfucker’d done some hard time, I tell you, and he’d never said what it was he done to be here in the first place.

Last Friday we’s all pushin up iron and he came by’n introduced his self. Motherfucker’d been seein us around n shit for goin on 12 years now. Shit. You can never trust a white man’ll part his hair down the middle like that I used to always say. And he came by’n introduced his self to us. Harper Patrick.

It used to be he’d piss the guards off something awful. He’d stand there like a coon in headlights, crossed-eyed and in a daze. Always sittin like a yogi, with that dumb notebook on ‘is lap. He’d get an ass whoopin with that book, I tell you. Them guards would beat the hell from him and piss on his bed before lockdown. He’d cry like a child who’d lost his momma at the marketplace, I tell you. And then it’s always the same.

Wait… why the fuck not…. WHY.. THE FUCK… NOT?

Niggers came’n went in this place. Like always, really. It used to be we’d get about a dozen a week, about nine would survive the first week. That’s a tough motherfuckin week, I tell you. Niggers be thinking they all hard, come time to prove his self, the nigger tucks his tail between his legs like a fuckin lap dog. One in particular, his name was Toby, ooh Harper took a liking to that nigger.

Graduated from some high school I’d never heard of, did some time once before for raping a ten year old outside a bowling alley. Motherfucker followed her to the police station, trying to get a second piece. Dumb nigger.

Word around the prison is Toby was the only one outside the guards who watched Harper fry that got to see what was in that god damn notebook.

We fucking told you, Clyde, and you keep talking about that fucking notebook. We just want to know what happened on Wednesday.

It was that god damn notebook, I tell you. He dropped it before he grabbed the fence.

Why was he on the other side?

Tuesday night he been screamin, not more’n usual. But I hear him use the pencil eraser for the first time I could recollect. Then he started crying, but it sound like he was chewin on somethin or tryin to hide in a pillow or somethin.

Did you ever, at any time, ask Toby what was written in the notebook?

I’d already told you. Toby dead. Guards shot’m in the nuts.

For what?

Runnin his stank mouth off. Nigger really never knew when to shut up.

So, ok. Back to Tuesday night.

That’s it. Didn’t hear a peep from Harper til sun up. We had breakfast and then went out to the recreation field. The goofy motherfucker’s just walkin around, standin still, walkin around n standin still, smiling at all the guards. Nothin too unusual, I tell you. Until’n he stopped at the shell trail. He just stood there and lifted his arms n started waving them in like a S formation. Like this. And then he flew.

He flew-

He flew. I done told you he flew over the god damn fence. The god damn guards were too shocked to do nothin about it. He landed on the other side of the fence and broke down. He just started cryin like I heard him cry Tuesday night. And he dropped the notebook n grabbed the hot fence. He look straight ahead as he done it, too. He was determined to end it all, I tell you. You all said I get a extra sandwich today for tellin you all this, right?
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An’ he looked at me, with those eyes tellin’ me I don’ understand nothin’. An’ he right.

Crazy son of a bitch begged to look through the pages an’ read it. Dared me. But I cain read none. And by the looks in his eyes and even how the words looked to me, I was real glad for it.

But he jess kep’ on doin’ that. Beggin’ me, an’ beggin’ me.

Finally he calm, but it took a long time, see. An’ he grabbed the notebook an’ went off by hisself again.

- Peg Johnson, inmate.